The effects of social media on relationships: Why divorce advice is going viral

A family law specialist has warned that social media platforms like TikTok and Instagram are reshaping modern relationships and contributing to marriage breakdowns.

Amar Ali, managing director at Reiss Edwards, said couples now face unprecedented pressure from viral relationship content that promotes unrealistic expectations and normalises ending relationships at the first sign of difficulty.

The quick-exit mentality

“Perhaps most concerning is the ‘quick exit’ mentality promoted across platforms like TikTok,” Ali explained. “Countless viral videos advocate leaving relationships at the first sign of difficulty rather than working through problems.”

Social media fuels trending hashtags such as ‘red flag’ and ‘the ick’ where users publicly discuss their partner’s flaws or minor annoyances. Although minor, these complaints come with the implication that they are a legitimate reason to end a relationship.

‘The ick’ hashtag has 18.4 thousand videos on TikTok and ‘red flags’ has 1.2 million videos. On Instagram, ‘red flag’ has 380,000 posts and ‘red flags’ has 109,000 posts. ‘Ick’ has 115,000 posts, ‘icks’ 11.8 thousand posts and ‘the ick’ has over 5,000 posts on Instagram.

These trends celebrate relationships ending and encourage viewers to walk away from partnerships rather than invest in resolving conflicts.

TikTok divorce advice simplifies the complex divorce process

Shockingly, there are 77,000 posts on Instagram with the hashtag, ‘divorce tips’ and 11.2 thousand videos on TikTok that feature the same hashtag. Users scrolling through their feed find oversimplified “how-to” guides that frame divorce as a quick fix rather than a last resort.

Instead of seeking counseling or legal advice, some individuals are using social media to figure out how to have a fast exit without the emotional or financial weight typically associated with the process. Using TikTok to understand a complex legal proceeding leads to couples underestimating the legal complexity and the long-term consequences of dissolving a marriage.

Unrealistic relationship standards

“Social media platforms create a distorted view of what relationships should look like,” Ali said. “Users constantly see perfectly curated romantic gestures and seemingly flawless partnerships, leading many to question their own relationships when they inevitably fall short of these artificial standards.”

He explained that these platforms rarely show the everyday compromises and challenges that form the foundation of successful long-term partnerships. The constant exposure to seemingly perfect relationships online creates a psychological effect where people believe the grass is always greener elsewhere.

This comparison culture particularly affects younger couples who have grown up with social media, with many developing unrealistic benchmarks for relationship satisfaction.

Public relationship broadcasting

“The culture of oversharing relationship details online creates additional pressure,” Ali said. “Couples feel compelled to broadcast their romantic lives, turning private matters into public performance.”

This practice often leads to external opinions influencing relationship decisions and creates permanent digital records of temporary relationship difficulties.

Exposure to potential partners

“Social media provides unprecedented access to alternative romantic options,” Ali added. “Direct messaging features make it easier to initiate conversations with potential new partners while still in a relationship.”

The constant visibility of alternative partners makes commitment feel more limiting than it was for previous generations.

Decline of quality time and connection

Excessive time on TikTok and other social media leads to partners being absent or distracted from being in the present moment with their partner. The constant distraction of checking for new posts or getting caught in a ‘doom scroll’ cycle can leave partners feeling lonely and frustrated.

According to the Global Statistics, there are 24.8 million TikTok users in the UK and users spend an average of 42 hours and two minutes a month on the application. This is the equivalent of an entire workweek spent online each month, instead of engaging with loved ones.

The Office for National Statistics reported that in 2022, there were just over 80,000 divorces in England and Wales. For opposite-sex couples, the average length of marriage before divorce was nearly 13 years.

However, social media influences might eventually shorten this timeframe. Couples who formed relationships in the social media era may show different patterns as they reach common divorce milestones.

Ali encourages couples to talk openly about how they use social media and set boundaries that work for both partners. That might mean stepping away from certain platforms now and then, having honest conversations about posts that feel uncomfortable, and making time to connect offline. These habits can help reduce the strain social media puts on modern relationships.

Couples should seek professional support before making relationship decisions based on social media comparisons. Relationship counselling can provide a neutral, professional perspective that algorithm-driven content cannot.